(I picked a great day to cut back on my caffeine intake…Lucky for me, I have a sense of humor, and can laugh at all the little mistakes my deprived mind made. On to the good stuff.)
By now, I’m sure you’ve read my newest entry, the start of what I assume will be a long series covering a past experience. This, I think, was the entire reason I wanted to start blogging. To get my thoughts out there, rather than leave them burrowed deep within myself.
This will give an intimate view to those who know me of where I’ve been, enlighten those who don’t know what it’s like to survive an ordeal like that, and hopefully inspire a few people to move some of the mountains in their life.
I think I was waiting for the “right time” to start it, even though I had no clue when that time would come. It’s ironic, when you think about it. Waiting for the right time to share a story of how I learned the only time we really have is now.
Don’t you worry though, this isn’t going to be all cloudy skies and rainy days. I’ll be making sure every other entry is about what’s going on now and whatever else catches my fancy. I don’t want to start seeing the past with both eyes. Just one is enough.
To anyone who might be reading this, do not pity me for what I’m about to tell you. I’ve never wanted that. This is just my way of telling my tale, and honoring those who have fallen before me.
Friday, March 25, 2011
“All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts;”
~ William Shakespeare
Life has been compared to many things, to a dance, to a boat, even to a box of chocolates. But this comparison plays a tune that I just can’t get out of my head. It’s a grand illusion that life is something we can control, manipulate, and be safe from 100% of the time. It’s foolish to try.
It is only after the realization settles in that death isn’t merely the end of life, but an integral part of it, an equal and opposite force, that your eyes can really see all the beauty that exists. This is the moment when life truly begins.
I’ve studied Bushido and read over and over “keep death in mind daily,” understanding the words, but I never realized until much later, just how much deeper those five words go. It isn’t simply an awareness that one isn’t immortal, and death may take you at any time. Even that mentality pushes important things to a later time, thinking that the end will come, but not for a time.
Being touched by death, and still remain living, pulls the curtain surrounding everything in life. Entire mindsets are reconfigured as the realization sets in.
We are born and we die. Everything else is up to us. We can’t choose what happens to us, but we can choose how it affects us, and what we’re going to do about it.
You can let people tell you how to live your life, or you can make a stand and rule your own existence. You can wish for your problems to go away, or you can work to overcome any obstacle.
Or, as was my greatest decision, you can choose to let your cancer destroy this one life you’re given, or you can fight.
This is my story.